This coded story I am sharing today is a part of my own story and is very close to my heart… As I revisit my past and how I navigated the infinite matrix, I unlock more gifts and can heal on a deeper level. I’m sharing this with you because I want to invite you to feel into my story, as it could relate to yours…
This is an invitation to revisit your own past with the wisdom that you have today, so you can heal on a deeper level and also access many of your gifts, wisdom, inner knowing, as it was often there already before!
Once upon a time…
There was a little girl, she was about 8 years old and she was going on holiday with her mum. She was sitting in the back of the car with her siblings looking out the window. She was looking up at the sky. In the sky, she could see all of these tiny little particles of life force energy. She was smiling! She loved it. She was so excited for the holidays which were going to be amazing, free and altogether with her family. Her love language is quality time so spending time with her family was just the best! Her spirit was high as she was floating with all the life force energy she could see floating around against the vast blue sky.
Questioning reality in the infinite matrix
But suddenly, there was a massive traffic jam. The car stopped and they stayed there for hours and hours on end. All of a sudden she started losing the connection with the life force energy she was seeing all over in the sky. She started looking at the cars all around her on the road and she had this instant knowledge that life was a circus, that life on earth made no sense at all.
‘What is this circus? And why am I here?’ she thought to herself.
‘Every human is there in their tiny box, everybody is stuck because everyone comes from the same place and wants to go to the same place and everybody is rushing at the same time! This doesn’t make any sense at all.’
She had this deep understanding that she was trapped in a tin box, unable to go anywhere. She had no clue why anymore, she just felt like she was suffocating. So she said to her mum ‘Mum, I just want to keep on looking at the bubbles in the sky, I don’t want to be trapped in this car anymore!’ Her mum turned back and asked her what she was talking about.
Her mum didn’t understand that she was talking about her deep need to be with life force energy instead of dropping her frequencies in stress and anxiety, impatience and feeling lost.
Discovering Ancient Egypt
On another day, when she was back from holiday, she was at school and she started learning about ancient Egypt, as taught by her primary teacher. This was so interesting to her, she was so excited to learn all about ancient Egypt! She had been talking about Egypt a lot with her mum and her siblings. They were all so passionate about the subject.
The teacher in the classroom started explaining how ancient Egypt was and how the pyramids were built and for what purpose.
This little girl raised her hand in the classroom and the teacher asked if she had a question. The little girl said ‘actually this is really not the truth, that’s not how the pyramids were built, that was not the purpose of this civilization.’
Her psychic abilities were then shut off
The teacher looked at her and then basically made fun of her and shamed her in front of the entire class. After that, she couldn’t say anything anymore, her channel was blocked and her claircognizance ability had shut off instantly because she was shamed in front of the classroom.
From that day on, she stopped sharing any downloads of information that she received through her channel because it had not been received in a nice way. There was no co-creation in the learning. She was expected to sit there and just receive whatever the teacher said even though she knew it wasn’t the highest truth.
That day she came home and said to her mother, ‘Mum, you know, I’m in jail. All children are in jail.’ Her mum replied, ‘what do you mean you’re in jail?’
The girl said ‘I have to go to this jail, school, for another 10 whole years and I hate it and nothing makes sense! I’m trapped, I’m not free!’
She started crying and crying and her mother didn’t know what to say. She had no other option. She was a single mother raising three children, she had no choice but to put her daughter into school.
So basically, that child cut off her ability to receive the direct messages that she could channel for the collective, coming from an innocent and pure place, to learn to fit in a system that was enslaving her day after day.
Connecting to the suffering of animals for the first time
Fast forward a couple of years later to when this girl was about 10 years old, she was sitting at the dinner table with her two siblings and her mother eating meat. All of a sudden she had this huge rush of frequencies inside of her. She jumped up and started running to the toilet, feeling super sick. She started crying and crying and crying. She could hear the voice of the animal screaming inside her. She felt all of the suffering of all of the animals that she had been eating. All the animals’ voices were screaming inside of her.
She came back to the dinner table and her mum asked her what was going on. She shared what happened. Her mum took her on her lap and cuddled her and said ‘It’s okay darling, you’re very connected to the animals. You don’t have to eat meat if you don’t want to, we will find alternatives.’
That little girl then became vegetarian for a while but she was the only one in the family to do so. Everywhere they would go, there would be no other vegetarians or vegans around. Then she started to crave meat, she really liked the taste! She became iron deficient and weak, she needed to take a lot of supplements that tasted very bad and she really didn’t like it at all…
So she started battling with herself about whether to eat meat or not. Everyone else was eating it and all these people were telling her she must eat it to stay healthy.
So she started to eat meat again and every time she found herself saying a prayer. Her mum told her ‘if you feel like you need to eat it, say a prayer to the animal and thank the animal for giving its life for you so you can grow into being a healthy human.’
So that little girl that day was full-on activated with the consciousness of the planet. Being able to feel and hear all the voices of the animals in the food she was ingesting.
The little girls understanding of the laws of life
When this little girl was about 11 she started receiving very distorted messages about karma.
Her parents were both following the yogic path around karma and reincarnation and were often talking to her about the fact that if we are on earth, it is because we need to purge our old karma from past lives.
She started realising that she was often lying, at times stealing in shops because she really wanted lollies. She could be so mean to her siblings when no one was watching so she could always get the best because she was the oldest and wanted to claim her power in that way.
After she realised this, she went to her mother again and said ‘You know what mum, I’ve had the biggest light bulb ever! I understand everything about the creation of the universe and karma.’
Her mum was surprised and asked what the lightbulb was, the girl replied ‘Actually, hell is Earth. Earth is hell, there is no difference! We are sent here, enslaved, we are trapped into doing these things and there is no escape. I’m trying my best, but how am I supposed to purge from past lives, when I cannot even purge from this current life with all that I have already done! Life on earth is hell and I hate it. I didn’t choose to come, I was forced to come, and now I must stay in this hell until I die. And then what, come back again?!”
Her mum was horrified and told her that this is not what all of these laws of life are here to be doing. She said ’These laws of life are here to give you strength and power and heart desires to anchor yourself into the light.’
She tried hard to make her daughter feel better about life but she was often depressed and lost herself, so in a way, she could relate to what her daughter was feeling…
Yearning to return to the stars
However, that belief system around karma and reincarnation stayed with her for a long time. It really cut her ability to understand her own divinity because, from that belief system, there was no way that she could be the angel or advanced soul that, deep down, she felt that she was.
During all of that time, she was still receiving a lot of advanced messages.
This little girl would constantly look up at the stars and wonder, ‘when are you going to come? I just want to feel you, I just want to go home. I’m not from here, why am I here? I’m lost and this is a mistake. You have to take me back!’
She was begging to go back. More and more she was consciously trying to leave physicality and begging for her angels to come and help her.
Experiencing big oscillation during childhood
Throughout all of her childhood, she was oscillating into very low frequencies such as Earth being hell where we are all trapped and enslaved and then at night she would oscillate into very high frequencies. Her angels would come and she would have all of these amazing lightbulb moments of intuitive wisdom showing her that she was here for a reason. She was strong and needed to stay. She would ask them ‘How can I be an infinite soul if I am trapped here in the wings of karma?’ The belief system that she was taught from her family, which was spiritual, awake and working on themselves to be better people, still made her feel trapped in this infinite matrix system.
Her mum was her pillar to keep her anchored in her divinity
Then teenage years came and she started going into massive withdrawal.
One day, she went to her mum and said ‘I really wish I was like everyone else, I don’t want to be like this anymore. It is exhausting. I just want to be like everyone else and not think about any of this! I want to be ignorant, it seems to be so much easier!’
Her mother told her ‘You know darling when I was pregnant with you, I went to a Sufi camp high in the mountains in the south of France. The Sufi master came to me and gave me all of these messages about you. You are a very old soul, you are not like anyone else and this is your path to understand why you are here. I’m doing my best to help you but there is not so much I can do. You were not born to be like everyone else, dare to be different, don’t be a sheep, be courageous!’
This little girl could really see that her mum was on her side. Her mum was her pillar who was there to keep her anchored into the remembrance of who she is. Her mum was there to confirm that she was different, not crazy and that she was not alone and separated from everyone else.
Her teenagehood was wild, anchored both in light and darkness
She entered her teenage years and she discovered alcohol, cigarettes and weed. She started to change her personality completely. She started hanging out with the ‘cool kids’ and organising parties at home. Her mum was happy for her to bring all her friends over as they were living in the city and she trusted her daughter to walk on her path in her own way. She was the queen of parties and she loved it! Throughout this time she was getting higher and higher on alcohol and weed which started at 14 and did not stop for decades.
She created an identity that would give her a sense of belonging because she always felt so lost otherwise. She was massively oscillating between different realms of reality and different worlds. There was no compass, apart from her mother.
Parties, alcohol and sex became her addictions, it made her feel happy and connected to others. In a way, it helped her not fall into isolation, depression and sadness. She was often sad and angry but then she would hang out with her friends and laugh and get high and all would seem to feel lighter.
How her parent’s path influenced her behaviour
Her mother kept on telling her, ‘Don’t be like a sheep, don’t be like everyone else, you were not born to be like everyone else and stuck in the infinite matrix system of 9-5.’
Her mother called other people ‘sheeps’! She understood that very well but at the same time she would see her mum on one side and her dad on the other side who had both learned so much about spirituality, yet they were both very unhappy and trapped in scarcity, in their emotions, in their limiting realities.
They had no money, they were lonely and oscillating constantly through their emotions. They were studying spirituality but they were not free!
She would think to herself ‘even if my parents, who tried to escape the matrix, are still lost then I am fucked.’
The sudden realisation of choosing timelines
So she continued partying until one day when she was about 17 her friend started talking about taking heavier drugs such as cocaine. It hit her all of a sudden! She was in this room just smoking weed and drinking alcohol when her friends started this conversation. She immediately saw something open in her field and she was taken into a premonition. She saw herself in the street of Amsterdam dying from a heroin overdose with a needle in her arm.
Instantly the voice came, if you go down that path this will be your future. She freaked out big time and it was the first time she understood the fact that many timelines are available to her. It placed the codes in her to be careful with the choices that she makes. Every time you make a choice you create a new timeline.
That opening basically saved her life because through all the parties she did and as her friends started taking all sorts of drugs, she would always only stick to ‘healthier’ weed and alcohol. She never went down that path.
Receiving cosmic surgery
All of these oscillations between realms happened at the same time as she was receiving more and more cosmic surgery. Sometimes she would be pinned down, she didn’t know what was happening, there would be light all around her and beings would be working on her. She didn’t know what it was, but it felt good and she let it happen. She was always more or less conscious of it during sleep time when it would happen.
Going to university to try and answer the big questions
During all her life, she was always looking for a deeper meaning to her life.
‘Why am I here?’
So she went to university because she really wanted to understand why humans are lost and fucked up. Why is society so crazy? She studied law, political sciences and international relations. Then she started studying nuclear strategy, nuclear weaponry because she could not understand how humans could have created the ultimate weapon to erase the whole of humanity. For her, it was mesmerising to live in such a reality when all resources are channeled to destroy life instead of promoting it.
During these studies, she realised that humans had created a society for two reasons. The first one is because they’re scared. It’s the fear of death that is so present in their systems that they will do everything that they can to not die.
The second was love. They would do everything they could to preserve what they had, to preserve their physical body, to preserve their family and their community. Because they didn’t know how to wire in this love by co-creating with others, they started wiring this love into building walls around them. To trap the one they loved because they didn’t know that love was meant to be freedom.
The quest for love
Those studies at university allowed her to understand that behind this whole circus of life on Earth, the quest for love was the real one. Humans wanted to protect themselves because of their loved ones. They love their way of living, more or less consciously, and they want to protect all of these things from disappearing. She chose to anchor that and to see humans through that lens of Love, instead of seeing humans as lost sheep. She stopped calling humans sheep and started recognising all humans as beautiful souls who are all looking for love, even though it was done in such a clumsy, misaligned way.
Being stuck in the infinite matrix
She began to understand that the yogic path she grew up in and was trained in, along with reiki and other healing modalities, were all frameworks with rules. And if you don’t obey the rules, nothing will happen! Or, worst-case scenario, you will fall all the way to the bottom of the ladder in terms of karmic wheels.
She started removing herself from these frameworks and modalities and started to understand that actually, that is the matrix! There is not one matrix, there is an infinite amount of matrices. The infinite matrix is everywhere and there is no escape!
If we escape the matrix, we are dead. When she started reclaiming more of her freedom codes and by observing what a belief system does to our frequency. Is the belief system upgrading our frequency and anchoring us into more love, trust and co-creation with the community? Or is the belief system separating and anchoring us into lower frequencies of believing life is so hard and feeling lost?
The Phoenix frequency of destruction and rebirth
Throughout this spiritual journey, she was going through all of these waves of emotion. Anger was burning, the dragon energy was rising and she would destroy everything on her path! The master Sufi told her mum when she was pregnant, that the name she was going to choose would be a name that represented the phoenix frequency, the rebirth, rising from the ashes. Her daughter was a shapeshifter, a phoenix frequency that would come and destroy and rebuild over and over again. Her destiny was to birth a new age upon the ashes of an old one.
When her mum told her this, she took it as an excuse to destroy herself because she knew she could rebuild herself. Instead of using all of this energy to create, she would use that energy to destroy herself. She would destroy herself in her fire and go down and experience all the lower realms and frequencies of hate, anger and sadness. Then she would climb back up again to higher frequencies.
She was constantly looking for something, for a compass, for something that was crystal clear and would help her understand why she is receiving so much information about the fact that we are all infinite souls and yet have this human experience. Something doesn’t quite add up? How could she put them both together? If there is an infinite amount of matrix systems then why did we come here? How do we navigate through the infinite matrix system?
Meeting her soul essence
As she went through her life, she received many initiations. One of the most powerful initiations she had was when she saw her soul essence. This was the essence of source frequency, of shapeshifting. This is being able to go into any reality, any thought, any emotion, any experience and feel it so deeply in her cells that she would be able to transmit and transmute them into very high levels of frequencies. This allowed her to learn to increase the electromagnetic field of the heart so it could go far beyond what we can perceive.
She could transmute so many frequencies from the earth and the higher realms which would create a massive torus field around her that anybody coming within metres would benefit from her presence, her codes and Love frequency that she was emanating from her heart.
The Quantum Fractal in the Infinite Matrix
Through all of these journeys growing up, it was fractal navigation that was lost in the matrix system. This is why this body of work is now being channeled through her…
The Quantum Fractal in the Matrix, is so life-changing. This is life-changing because it gives direction, it is a compass for all the fractals, for all the humans that are navigating within the infinite matrix systems.
This is now what Cendrine teaches to others, as she continues her journey of accelerated evolution, embracing now a pure and radiant body, a clear mind and a deep connection to who she is beyond time and space reality.
Revisiting my story
I trust that this story has helped connect you to your own experience in physicality here, on our beautiful Earth. May we honour all of our individual experiences, as so many pathways of evolution offered to us to return back to our unique soul, into the unified field of consciousness.
For a long time, I would look at my story through the lens of lower frequency and judgement. I was not good enough, why did I do all those things?!
But I had to change that viewpoint as it was dense and lacked compassion. If we look at our story through a low-frequency lens, alchemy and self-love are not possible.
Through revising this story I choose to see that I was courageous, I could have exited many times. Many of us have thought about ending it, let’s be honest. Why stay? It can feel so fucked up. But we are all still here, we are all still standing! We are courageous and powerful beyond measure!
I would love to invite you to reflect on your story and see yourself as a beautiful fractal experiencing this infinite matrix system, to really honour yourself, your courage and the love that you have for yourself; because you are still here.
That alone already shows you that your soul has got you but also your human has got you too!
Keep shining bright, because the world is a much better place when you are unapologetically you!!!